Two beautiful words I fell in love with during the short vacation to Amsterdam. We were on a boat cruise, me and two friends who happen to be a lovely couple. So it was my last day there and it got us talking about memories and nostalgia. And T told us about this word that Brazilians use to describe the feeling when you are melancholic about having to say good bye but happy that you made all those profound memories.. saudade. I don’t think English language does justice to what this word actually entails because it just doesn’t describe how intense those feelings are. Someone here has rightly said that its an ‘untranslatable and undeniably potent’ word.
And while we were on the subject of how English language has no words to describe such deeply felt beautiful or heart breaking emotions and moments, we landed on another word: gezellig. Its a Dutch word which describes the feeling of being cozy and having fun with your friends. It’s a little to do with the ambiance of the place where you are and a lot more about the people you are with. Happy word.
And I recently learnt about a German word that evokes such deep nostalgia that no English or Urdu word has ever been able to do: sehnsucht. It represents thoughts and feelings about all facets of life that are unfinished or imperfect, paired with a yearning for ideal alternative experience. It tells of a longing for a place we have never been to.. a far-off country, but not a particular earthly land which we can identify.
Now isn’t this the most nostalgic and beautiful word you know? And isn’t it just unfair if we go through life feeling these really deep, complicated emotions without even having a word to explain how we feel.
So, I’m sitting in my office- dream office actually,if you would allow me a little pretentiousness. Only a few people know how much I have always wanted to be here. I have a HUGE respect for what they do and also the whole world kinda knows about them These days, however, what makes me fall in love with this office everyday is nothing deep or philosophical at any level (but take my word for it that it allows many of those moments just by being itself).. its a glass wall ladies and gentlemen. Yeah, I know its pretty cool. So this glass wall lets me enjoy every change in weather while sitting inside- sunny day, rainy day, windy day (that’s when the trees go berserk). And makes my work a little less drab.
So I’m sitting here after working tirelessly for the last four days and today i just don’t feel like putting myself through the grind. Friday..lazy day. Eh. Listening to your soul and going a little Alchemist kinda day.
Posting old posts from my old blog here so I can revisit them any time I want. I like doing that sometimes. Not for any particular reason. Just that it helps me see events and people in retrospect which gives a sort of looking-back-and-connecting-the-dots-like-a-steve-jobs feeling. And sometimes it just makes me happy about how far i have come emotionally as well as in life generally.
So i was talking to this girl who I am car pooling with these days and we were talking about our fav shows. Sons of Anarchy came up and she told me how besides all the Harley-Davidsons in the show, what keeps her glued to it is the dynamics of how the street gangs work. The organization, the hierarchy, the rules they have to live by. That they have a complete mechanism in place for going about their daily routine. She went on for about two minutes. And you know that feeling when you suddenly realize you are not such a freak? Yeah, i got that feeling. And I told her how glad I am to know other people also over think about something as mundane as a show.
So, may be I should get back to work and do this a little more often. Writing about my day, that is. Always helps.
It’s that time of the year again. When the winds begin to pick up and the sweaty afternoons slowly give way to foggy mornings. The old gives way to the new. And its this time of the year that brings with it a desire to shed the old skin and begin anew.
They say reminiscing about the past is a sign of getting old. Is it? I don’t think so. It’s a sign that you are alive and you are human. That there is a part of you that is not willing to change- your memories.
I love starry summer nights and sunny winter days but for a person who is not very receptive to change, its ironic that i love the seasons of change the most. I love autumn and spring. I love the rite of passage from summer to winter and winter to summer. I love how before giving in to winters, a cycle of transition and rejuvenation occurs. Autumn with its yellow leaves and crisp winds, chilly mornings and hot afternoons. And I love how just before the breeze begins to get warm after a long winter spell, another cycle of rejuvenation occurs- spring with its colorful glory turning everything it touches into a beautiful and hopeful mess.
I guess part of the appeal for autumns and springs lies in the fact that they are beautiful rites of passage. They leave behind what was with such grace and foray into the unknown with such poise.
Do our souls always carry the message of what we were supposed to be?Why is it that most people get lost in doing something they were never meant to do only to live a life that is not even half as happy as it could have been with a little courage? Why are so few people courageous? Why is it that most people are born where they will never be understood or marry where they will never be fulfilled? Why do we long for a place we have never known, a feeling we have never experienced before, a person we have never met? Why do we cry in the rain and lie under the starry sky? What do we want from ourselves and from the world and the people who love us? Why do we keep running when there is nowhere to run to? There is no door in the world which we can take to get out of it.
I would grab a camera and a journal and set off to see the world.
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